Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Randomize