dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
