In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
