What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
