Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
40s are totally the cure
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize
