Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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