Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize
