Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize