Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
