I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Randomize