I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
