i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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