3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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