Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
