I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
