i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
