ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
