tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
