I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
