I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Randomize
