his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
