stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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