I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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