I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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