She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
