My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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