the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
