i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
