Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
