Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
