I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
