i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
