Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
We are two peas in an std pod
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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