Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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