And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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