K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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