I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize