First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
