If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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