My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Hippo gnu deer
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
