Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
