Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Damn victory sex feels great
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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