U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
