As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
