thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize