Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
