I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize