I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize