it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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