oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
